Sep 7: Minority Theme Parks

It turns out that our tour package to the Li river included an additional tour through a place called Shangri-La, decked out as a stylized local village of the Zhuang people -- referred to simply as a "minority" by the Chinese -- adjacent to the real village.

"They don't wear clothes," said our guide before we got there. "They wear animal skins!"

In fact, what they wear is animal print cotton, but who's noticing? I was far too busy trying to figure out -- as we were slowly ferried around a lake stopping in front of various platforms to see costumed girls dancing, leopard-print-wearing men sounding hunting horns, and warriors jumping out of the brush to shake a spear at you -- why it seemed so familiar.

And then it came to me. . . It was It's a Small World -- except the puppets were alive. If that sentence just gave you the heebie jeebies, I assure you, the ride was still worse.